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Lovejoy Counselling
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Accredited by the British Association of Counsellors & Psychotherapists (BACP)
Sometimes people struggle to say sorry. Accountability seems to be far from them and they just evade responsibility for their mistakes. Why? Sometimes people have learned not to apologise.They might feel scared to be imperfect, feel too vulnerable to say sorry or perhaps they have no self awareness and therefore they believe they didn't do anything wrong. Sometimes people's ego's or sense of self is so fragile sorry is an impossible word to say because they would feel devastated, world ending if they believed they were wrong.So how to work with someone who is never wrong! Protect your peace, you know they were wrong. Having that emotional boundary helps to look after yourself. Stay curious, "what made you do that?", "why did you say that?" "Did you realise it would hurt me?" etc Don't accept misplaced blame. "Chasing" someone to be accountable is exhausting. Consider if they are worth your efforts. www.lovejoycounselling.co.uk/#apologising#confrontation#relationshiptherapy#onlinecounselling#conflict
Accepting the parents we have instead of longing for the parents we want...can be an incredibly painful but freeing process. Having the same expectations of a parent and being repeatedly disappointed can be more painful.Good psychological boundaries can help support difficult relationships, helping us navigate them in a healthier way that's better for us.Link in bio as well ❤️🩹 www.lovejoycounselling.co.#attachmenth#relationshipcounsellingl#ToxicRelationshipssh#anxietyanddepressions#griefgrief
We're not all calm, patient, placid people.Sometimes we may see others who seem to stay in control of their emotions and wonder what's wrong with us!Childhood experiences, attachment, trauma, gender, epigenetics, culture, hormones...all of these and more, affect our ability to self regulate and control ourselves. So if you're "too patient" or have "anger issues"... both of these emotional regulation difficulties can be recognised and changed. Once we recognise the reasons, body signals, and challenges of our own personal emotional responses we can support ourselves and change them.Link in bio as well ❤️🩹 www.lovejoycounselling.co.uk/#emotionalregulation#angerissues#mentalhealthandwelbeing#manculture#onlinecounselling
How does your social media algorithm affect your mental wellbeing? It could be a great motivator, educational, and help you explore subjects of interest. However be mindful of the tipping point. The point where your algorithm and the adverts targeted at your age and gender that once were good(!) now turn into a toxic relationship of making you feel bad about yourself. Makes you feel like everything you're doing isn't good enough, you're not good enough, you don't have enough, or your relationship isn't good enough.Being mindful of the "feed" and when the "tipping point" happens can really help your mental health. Social media is okay, but notice and be careful when it changes and makes you feel depressed, stressed or anxious, or not good enough. Know when to put it down.Link in bio as well ❤️🩹 www.lovejoycounselling.co.uk/#onlinecounselling#abuse#highpeak#mentalhealth#anxiety
You can't change others but you can work on yourself. Self Mastery is important for day to day functioning and relationships.Personal responsibility - accepting when we're wrong and not making someone else out to be the one to blame.Cultivating Compassion - yes compassion for others and how they may be feeling, but also for yourself, your life is challenging too.Conscious response - instead of reacting to the people around you, being able to take a step back, pause, think, reflect and then respond to others and circumstances.Self Mastery, we can change the world around us by changing us, our behaviour.Link in bio as well ❤️🩹 www.lovejoycounsellin#CBT.#reactivebehavioure#triggersandmindfullnessn#onlinetherapyi#PTSDrapy#ptsd
,Unequal division of house work and child responsibilities. What causes the most strain on your relationship? Couples who are parents often find themselves "staying together for the kids". The emotional connection between the couple has been lost and both parents quietly quit the relationship and live parallel lives. Separation and then divorce often follow as the "battle lines" are drawn. But there was a step before the quietly quitting and it often involves arguments or resentment over the division of roles of the house and with family. DON'T ignore the signs(!) and think your partner will "get over it". Communication and experience of past relationships affect couples. Willingness to really listen to your partner and not dismiss them could save your marriage.Link as also be found in my bio.www.lovejoycounselling.co.uk/#couplestherapy#couplescounselling#divorce#relationshipadvice#quietlyquittingrelationship
Social "norms" for men's behaviour maybe trashing men's mental health.Masculinity seems to embody many traditional values like responsibility, loyalty and providing for family. However.The cultural expectations or values around men's emotional silence, dominance and control can make life immensely challenging and even make certain emotions worse... anger and sometimes violence which may lead to domestic abuse.Going against those internal narratives and cultural norms and talking about feelings can be incredibly difficult....but sometimes necessary.Talk to a friend, break the silence. Talk to a counsellor or therapist in a safe confidential space. Link in bio as wellwww.lovejoycounselling.co.uk/#mensmentalhealth#anger#depression#masculinity#onlinetherapy
Our brains like short cuts.Habits or addictions are superhighways of neurological connections. Eg Overwhelm = Alcohol= CalmDopamine amplifies the reward connection.Recognising triggers, (in this instance the emotion Overwhelm) can help us begin to change our reactions, (drink alcohol). Preventing/managing/ our triggers in a different way can help us break the habit.It's not just willpower. It's retraining and rewiring our brains. Link in bio as wellwww.lovejoycounsellin#addiction##anxietyn#stresst#depressiond#onlinetherapyinetherapy
Finding yourself super stressed? Stop moving Breathe deeply Can you see 5 things ? Can you hear 4 noises? Can you feel the texture of 3 things? Can you smell 2 things?Can you slowly taste something? Grounding techniques can help our minds and bodies calm and reset.Link in bio as wellwww.lovejoycounselling.co.uk/#GroundingTechniques#stress#traumatools#breathingtechniques#counselling
